Feeling down, I am making myself think back to a few nights before when I could not help be grateful.
A warm glow from the kitchen illuminated the last slice of a warm delicious apple pie Mama made and that ended up as my late dinner - rivers of cream cascading down, and sitting in the semi darkness a welcome but sadly forgotten feeling came: gratefulness suddenly filled me.Cradling my tea, I realized I havent often felt grateful in so long, and suddenly I savored every blessing, and it felt wonderful.
Silently loving the people in my life, grateful that they slept soundly nearby, or that they must be happily and safely - I hoped- busy in a different time zone somewhere far, I thought of things - good things, positive things, that somehow at that moment had the power to outweigh heavy burdens and shine bright enough to light me up even as things seem dark and dim.
Sadly, today is not a similar case, but that magic feeling made me happy - and perfect or not - I loved myself, my gifts and my very own room for its comfort,happy that there was this space for me in the world, even as entire families live in single rooms less than half the size, that many out there were feeling cold and hungry, and I was aware, drifting into sleep under cozy blankets,
that while I had my burdens, I have much to be grateful for, and much to love about me and my life, and that I had God to thank - for blessing us Kindly,Patiently even while I can be oblivious.
And even as we like to be appreciated for whatever we may give someone, and may be angered by the lack there-of !
Above painting by Erin Pendleton
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